Cereal description: Whole corn grain and corn meal inflated into uniform orbs — half of them a pleasant light brown that visually says “chocolate,” the rest a light tan hue that, well, doesn’t.

Jean-Paul Sartre once famously said there are just two types of people in this world: those who like Cocoa Puffs, and those who prefer Cocoa Krispies. Or maybe it was Seinfeld who said it. Either way, ...